Everybody avoids emotional pain. WHY?
Whenever my emotions were triggered I used to feel my pain sooo very strongly. Growing up, this was a huge 'predicament' for me, because I was felt isolated from the people around me. They didn't get me. My greatest longing was to be understood and to be loved the way I was.
This longing turned into a need. A need for Love. Later in life I started looking to get love from a person close to me, a person outside of myself. I needed to be told that I was important or valuable, I needed to be acknowledged. I needed this confirmation so badly, it felt like an addiction. And it remained with me into my early 40s.
If my story had gone differently, if my feelings were valued, acknowledged, if I could have talked about them, I would probably have felt a lot more worthy and loved back then.
When we don't talk about our pain, it gets pushed into the subconscious mind, where it then becomes invisible to us, so we forget that we have this energy still in us. Until an 'unpleasant' event occurs which is there to trigger that pain, so we can look at it, embrace it and release it.
We can not push feelings away, or avoid feeling pain, tell people not to talk about it, be secretive or very private AND feel truly happy.